Recovery Road: The Healthy Breakup

The highest of highs

The lowest of lows

And all the ‘stuff’ in between.

Once we were flying together 

Now we’re two shooting stars in opposite directions.

-NoP

In my withdrawal from “the high”, I jumped at the first opportunity to be enmeshed. This last breakup hurts more than I could have ever imagined. But it has been the most rewarding, for my truth moving forward, my self-esteem and confidence.  

As a Love Addict, letting go of my attachement to outcomes is most challenging. In recognizing my strengths in my partnership, as well as my shortcomings, I’m able to understand(after many attempts to move forward), what I deserve from myself and for myself.

  • Time to get to know an individual pass the “infatuation phase”
  • Consistency in behavior(“good” or “bad”), tells a story clearer than what is spoken
  • Feeling anxious, a sign things aren’t being communicated
  • Owning my feelings
  • My partner inquiring why “I feel the way I feel…”/Improving on uncomfortable behaviors (vice versa)
  • Being direct in needs
  • Asserting self-boundaries/Boundaries with others
  • Holding accountability for self/others
  • Knowing a relationship isn’t needed(especially if it’s unhealthy) but wanted by those involved.
  • Contribution to the growth of the relationship by those involved 

This past year has offered me much insight into what a healthy, interdependent relationship is. And eventhough the majority of the year showed the fears of my dependency, the Universe was still able to reach my heart.

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